Inquiries about invisibility

I'm sure that many people out there have many inquiries about a human being living as an invisible man. My Great, Great Grandfather, Dr Hershal Griffon is said to have achieved invisibility due to some sort of injectable serum. It is also said that he went quite mad when he found that he would be that way permanently.

I am hoping at great lenghts that I will maintain my sanity throughout these trying times... although I sometimes feel I might already be losing it. This blog is one of the ways that I attempt to maintain some sort of contact with other people. So Please, feel free to leave me comments or just say hello.

Anyway... I'm sure that there are many questions that one might have about me being invisible.

I will try to answer what I know so far here.

1. Do you have to be naked to be invisible?

Answer: No... fortunately for me when I entered the Radiation chamber I was fully clothed. My clothing that I was wearing was also bombarded with ambient radiation and became completely invisible just like me. Those articles of clothing consist of a Polo shirt, Boxer shorts, Docker Khaki pants, a Pair of Socks and my beloved and extremely comfortable pair of Converse All Star Chuck Taylor high top sneakers. ( which have come in quite indispensable although extremely difficult to tie the laces.)

I was also wearing my old Lab Coat which I have placed in a secret hiding place along with my Identification badge (which still works in the magnetic receiver. Interesting) My keys, a few now useless pens and bits of paper and my Wallet and its now useless contents. The one Item I did keep in my possession is my Stainless Steel Pocket Knife... which is also completely invisible and might come in handy if I can maintain its whereabouts.

2. When I eat, can you see the food pass through me?

Answer: Only at first. When I place food into my mouth it looks normal, but as I chew it, it mixes with my saliva and invariably becomes invisible as well. But this only occurs with natural food, fruit, vegetables, meat, dairy and breads that have not been bombarded with unnatural chemicals. And when I pass them out they maintain their invisibility for a limited time and then they reappear (in their new form of coarse, I wont disgust you with details)

As a matter of fact... Anything that is a part of my body or is excreted from my body maintains its invisibility accept that which I eat or drink. I had to use a pair of electric clippers just yesterday to give myself a well needed trim of my hair and my beard. The excluded hair remained to be invisible, as well as any new hair which has grown since. I suppose this includes blood that my heart produces as well otherwise I would be quite frightful indeed.

3. Can you see yourself?

Answer: No, not really. But I seem to be a bit blurry to myself if I do concentrate very hard on the subject... almost to the point of passing out. If I close my eyes, I can still see everything, but the world around me becomes slightly blurry after a while. As do the items that I have with me that were bombarded. To sleep I must wrap my eyes in something completely dark and hope for the best. Some of the simplest tasks become extremely difficult when you become completely invisible.

I suppose its somehow the same as being blind... accept the exact opposite.

I see EVERYTHING... accept myself.

Problems with being invisible

The thought of being invisible sets every person into a small fantasy in which they go around doing various fun things without being detected.

Well, let me tell you that it is definitely not all "fun and games".

Ask any man, "What would you do if you were invisible?" and I guarantee that his first response is that he would infiltrate a girls locker room. Well, I am here to tell you that infiltrating girl's locker rooms quickly runs out of steam. Your pornographic movies most certainly lie to you. Girls in locker rooms are not engaging in lesbian action whilst popping each other in the ass with wet towels. They come in, they undress, very nonsexual I might add... and then they shower. When they shower they do it in a procedure based manner... they do not soap themselves up and proceed to engage in pleasuring themselves. The locker room is obviously an uncomfortable space for them so they are in and out as quickly as possible. I just wanted to clear that up. Besides... being invisible is not the same as being a ghost. You are still physically there and it is quite a pain to maintain absolute silence whilst trying desperately not to interfere with others action.

Being physically invisible and being presently invisible are two different problems all together.

Oh... and if you get a Little too zealous and accidentally get wet in the shower room, the water on your person tends to pool and show up as a transparent outline.

It freaks the girls out something terrible.

Invisibility isn't what its cracked up to be.

I thought I would start off by explaining a little bit about how I became invisible in the first place.

Man is the most curious creature in the world, perhaps even the galaxy... maybe even the universe. Since the dawn of science we have attempted to push the envelope and create things that we before only had the audacity to imagine. There is a near unlimited source of scientific advancements that man has accomplished throughout history (just use google or wikipedia)... but there are a handful of advancements that remain just out of our never resting reach.

Among these are turning Iron into Gold, finding an energy source that is 100% renewable, understanding women and... Invisibility.

Through the power of Nuclear Physics and the never ending funding of the U. S. Government we were commissioned to find out the secrets of invisibility for military purposes. Just imagine it. An entire platoon of invisible Navy SEALS... complete with invisible weapons. Rumor has it that invisibility has been achieved several times before, but the results were always very negative and the facts were swept under the rug of Democracy.

I wont go into all the boring details of the experiment for two reason.

1. The normal blog reader wouldn't understand it and would become lost and discontent.

2. Those who could understand it would indubitably use it to their own twisted advantage.

Anyway, as I was saying... we proceeded with the experiment which we called "Project Wonderland". In layman's terms, it was a large chamber that irradiated the subject with different frequencies of radiation until the subjects molecules refracted light in such a way as to become completely transparent. There was a pause in the experiment due to a halt from upper government management. It was almost like they were trying to lose the race between the U. S. and China. (Yes, China is also experimenting with invisibility... as well as Japan, Germany and Russia). An Army of invisible soldiers and invisible tanks and invisible missiles and invisible jets would rocket any country to the Top of the food chain of World domination.

So... I snuck in at night and ran the machine on myself. Stupid, I know... but it worked, much to my dismay. So now I am on the run. Trying to find a way to reverse the process. Trying to figure out who sabotaged the experiment. Trying to find aout if there are more like me.

I don't sleep much anymore.

Its hard to sleep when you can see through your own eyelids.